Some days I really feel like an athlete. Striding down the road, full of myself and my abilities. But then there are days that I feel like a wannabe runner. That was me today. As I'm joggin' down the road, thoughts are runnin' thru my head:
"you are SO slow."
"hope no one sees you running, they'll wonder why you're even trying."
"what were you thinkin' entering a marathon."
"you're never gonna make it."
"you don't even push yourself"
And it goes on and on. I don't really know why today was so bad. I'm very critical of myself. I knew my pace was slow and it went downhill from there. I try to speed up but my legs feel heavy. Then I feel defeated. Then I get mad. I was suppose to run 30 minutes. I think it should be easy for me to complete 3 miles in that time. But I don't so I make myself keep running until I do hit 3 miles. And it only took me 31:10. I was just over a 10 min/mile. Realistically, I should be okay with that all things considered. So why wasn't I?